Yeah, I forgot about this blog. Yeah, there's a lot to update on.
1. Lost job due to covid
2. Dad got worse and then passed away peacefully in his sleep
3. No school right now
That's the biggest one, my Dad. Realistically I know he's gone, I'm not in denial. I said my goodbyes and he's in a better place. But I still want to tell him stuff and expect him to come back. But I know he wont. I disconnected his phone, credit cards, there's the death certificate, all this stuff, but I still expect him to call me or text me. I made a memorial for him a couple days before he passed because my brain compelled me to do it. I've gotten rid of a bunch of expired and unused food, threw away a lot of stuff. Been getting the main part of the house cleaned up so it's functional for me. I have to go through probate, which is >.< But it's all going to work out. I know that. It's just weird. A part of me knows the house needs the little updates and such, and a part of me feels bad. But Dad had said it's ok to let things go and get rid of things. So I don't know. But that's really it. I'm not in school right now bc of everything happening. But I'll go back obviously. I promised everyone, my dad, and myself. So yeah. I'll get a job too. Need a month off maybe two. But no longer because I love working, and I want to socialize and earn money. But I'm very thankful for my support system and the people who loved my Dad. And I'm very thankful for the relationship with my Dad before he passed. It wasn't perfect and there's still things I didn't tell him, that he didn't need to know, but I'm glad with how things ended between us. I'm still getting flashbacks of the bad times in the end but I know they'll pass. I'm sorta sleeping on my own. It takes time, I don't know how long, it doesn't have a timeframe. But yeah, the title of this post is what he told me and others. And yeah.
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